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Where losers are immortalized

THE PIT OF DESPAIR

The record book nobody wants a page in. Blowouts absorbed, points squandered, and the sacred ledger of punishments.

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THE WOODEN SPOON RANKINGS

All-time last-place finishes — the managers who've spent the most time in the Pit.

Provisional — based on final standings. The official last-place list (some finishes are skewed by the losers-bracket scoring quirk) is pending and will be corrected once supplied.

THE PUNISHMENT LEDGER

Who got to pick each season's punishment — the reigning champion. Known last-place finishers and punishments are filled in below; the rest stay marked pending until you send the official lists (the losers-bracket data on ESPN isn't reliable enough to trust). A ☠ Kill Shot marks a punishment that ran the loser out of the league for good.

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THE KICKER LOTTERY

Every franchise's all-time kicker luck — total points their kickers scored above or below the league's per-team kicker average each season, following ownership changes. Nobody drafts a kicker on purpose. (2018–2025, where box scores exist.)

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THE DEFENSE LOTTERY

Every franchise's all-time D/ST luck — total points their defenses scored above or below the league's per-team defense average each season, following ownership changes. The stream-and-pray position. (2018–2025, where box scores exist.)

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